21.04.2009 Crappy Day...

cinderello: [..]
Kingkang: [..]
cinderello:
Kingkang: [..]
cinderello:
Kingkang:
cinderello: its a crappy day
cinderello: or week...
Kingkang: it is...
cinderello: im starting to get lost..
cinderello: i'm sorry..
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
cinderello: is that a power hug?
Kingkang: i hope...
cinderello: i need that so bad..
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
cinderello: transformer*
cinderello: that supposed to be smiley transformer...not working
cinderello: [..]
cinderello: [ .. ]
Kingkang: anu yan...
cinderello: [ . . ]
cinderello: di pa rin..
Kingkang: it gets bigger...
cinderello: oh well...jst imagine me getting energize...with the power hug..
Kingkang:
cinderello: btw how r u?
Kingkang:
cinderello: and that means what?
Kingkang: http://www.imeem.com/people/XIZ3X/music/7aqiCzH3/vienna-teng-cannonball/
Kingkang: its raining outside...
Kingkang: hmmm ok kelangan ko ikwento....
Kingkang: i was fine knina...
Kingkang: hmmm as in good.....
Kingkang: and then i saw ur shoutout....
Kingkang: and....i....dont know....
Kingkang: and then nagonline ka...
cinderello: oh...i havent told u yet...
cinderello: my sis and i is palnning to surpised my mom for mother's day..
Kingkang: and im not feelin so wel...and u sed it was a crappy day..and i dont know how to cheer u up..
Kingkang: nope...we havnt talk for a week?...
cinderello: i'm been really confused and lost lately...and i guess my trip will help me re-evaluate things..
Kingkang: confused because....
Kingkang: lost because????
cinderello: it was not really plan...she just told me about it..
Kingkang: ahhh thats gud..tita wil be happy...
cinderello: its about school...coz i'm starting to question if i'm on the right path..
Kingkang: hmmmm....
Kingkang: i wish i could do something.....
cinderello: i'm good... i can figured it out myself...dnt worry i'll be fine
Kingkang: hmmmm...sure?...
Kingkang: hmmm i feel really bad kapag nakikita kitang hindi ok....
cinderello: i been talking with my bro about it...i'm sorry for not telling you first...
Kingkang: ok lang...they're ur family...
cinderello: its been really tough fot both of us already...and this will make things more complicated..
cinderello: i wish i can just go there and explain everything to u..
Kingkang: hai...
Kingkang: i cant....
Kingkang: cry here...
cinderello: wag...baka sabihin ng coworker mo may nag-paiyak sa u..
Kingkang:
cinderello: ...currently i'm lost and frustrated...tawag nga sa kin ni kuya...i'm a lost soul daw...parang kaluluwa
Kingkang: hmmm hindi ko maintindihan...
Kingkang: can u make me understand?............
Kingkang: ayaw mo ba ng ginagawa mo?...
Kingkang: i mean is there anything else u wana do?
Kingkang: bat ganun?...
Kingkang: hindi mo maexplain...
cinderello: its complicated...
cinderello: ...but i'll try..
Kingkang: hmmmm...please?
Kingkang: it pains me to know that all this time i thought u were ok....
cinderello: well technically i was trying to be Ok...and i was...
Kingkang: and?....
cinderello: but i have to make a decision after the end this semester if i would like to continue this or not..
Kingkang: hmmm....
cinderello: ...and its a combination of things...i dnt wanna settle to something i felt like not worth it..
Kingkang: and....
Kingkang: hmmm.....
cinderello: i know its hard to comprehend...
Kingkang: mejo...
Kingkang: but ill try....
cinderello: ...our tuition fee is getting higher next year...and last 2 semesters i felt so drianed out of eveything...
Kingkang: hmmmm...
cinderello: ...getting to grad school is an investment here...meaning u borrow money to pay for it...and i look at it as...
cinderello: why will u invets into something that you dnt really enjoy soing..
cinderello: i mean doing...
cinderello: haha...i know magulo ako...
Kingkang: hmmmmm no its getting clear...
cinderello: i'm looking at some other programs...maybe acutally going to Med School instead..
Kingkang: anu daw?
cinderello: my plan is to take a year offf to work and find myself...
cinderello: i think thats my biggets mistake...i went to grad school right away...and i get drained out quickly
Kingkang: hmmmm.....
Kingkang: ok i get it......
Kingkang: gets ko na...
cinderello: most people kasi they work after getting their bachelors then apply...i was just pressured to do it..
Kingkang: pressure?
Kingkang: by?
Kingkang: tama ba yung tanong ko...
Kingkang: oh wel..
Kingkang: i get now the whole picture...
cinderello: pressured by myself i guess...i was like i wanna be done by this AGe...not thinking about the reality of it..
Kingkang: hmm ayan...
cinderello: i'm just too goal oriented...i guess..
Kingkang: probably....
Kingkang: and there are really some goals na hindi kagd naa-achieve...
Kingkang: you cant rush things cinderello....
cinderello: some of my classmates have family already...and i guess the were more matured than i am in that respect...
Kingkang: cguro...and maturity comes with age as well...
cinderello: i think i need to grow more and discover my true passion..
Kingkang: hmmmm follow your heart....
Kingkang: para in the end you'll never regret anything...
cinderello: I will...
cinderello: its just hard sometimes to make that decision...
Kingkang: agree...
cinderello: its killing me...i just wish its jst as easy as 123..
Kingkang: i know...
cinderello: i hope i'm making sense to u...
Kingkang: yep...
Kingkang: giving up that opportunity esp that uv started that already is not easy at all...
cinderello: thats actually the hard part...
Kingkang: let me remind u of something before making ur decision....
cinderello: but..i consider it as a learning process...as a part of me discovering myself..
cinderello: it actually help me grow as a person...i realized i do wanna help people..
Kingkang: hmmm...
Kingkang: good...
Kingkang: and?
cinderello: so whats that u wanna remind me..
Kingkang: hmm kala ko may sasabihin ka pa...
Kingkang: wait nacurious ako sa "u do wanna help people"
Kingkang: wen was that?..i mean....wat happend..
Kingkang: may sens ba yung tanong ko..hehe..
cinderello: meron namn...
Kingkang: thats not negative though...
Kingkang: hindi ko lang madalas na marinig sayo yon...
cinderello: helping people to feel better...and other thing i wanna do related to international health...
Kingkang: hmmm thats new...
cinderello: the DPt program will limit me working jst here in the US
cinderello: and i thought i wanna do more..
Kingkang: i mean thats the first time ive heard u talking about wat u wanna do....cinderelloides maglakwatsa of course....
Kingkang: hmmm im seeing some maturity here ladies and gentlemen....
cinderello: wel i guess thats a positive thing...
Kingkang: of course sir...
cinderello: so yhea...maybe i'm just crazy
Kingkang: haha..
cinderello: maybe...i'm really a lost soul..
Kingkang: natawa ko don...
cinderello: haha..
Kingkang:
Kingkang: u have the power to make me cry and afterwards make me smile..
Kingkang: ang kulet...
Kingkang: hay....
Kingkang: i do hope u find ur soul cinderello....
cinderello: btw the song was beautiful..
Kingkang: alin...
Kingkang: a cannonball...
cinderello: i know sometimes its really hard to say whats going on..
Kingkang: hmmm yes....
cinderello: stones taught me to fly
love, it taught me to lie
life, it taught me to die
so it's not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball
Kingkang: sakto....
Kingkang: hmmmm i have to say something...
cinderello: yes...
Kingkang: hmmm i cant...........
Kingkang: put together the words...
Kingkang: saka na...
cinderello: i'm very optimistic though...i know He have plan for me...for us..
Kingkang: totally agree....
Kingkang: pray cinderello...
Kingkang: it'll help u decide....
cinderello: its just me driving somwhere...then naligaw lang ng ilang kanto...but i will figure out the right way eventually..
Kingkang: ayos yun a....
Kingkang: i hope kung sang kanto ka man mapunta makita mo ko....
cinderello: i just wish and pray for HIm to guide me to find the right way...and to remind me to pick u up...
Kingkang: hmmm parang bato na nakakalat lang sa kanto....kelangan pulutin...
Kingkang: He will guide u...
cinderello: i just wish you can be on my passenger seat right now..
Kingkang: And I just wish ur car is just outside...
Kingkang: And i would mind going anywhere..
Kingkang: wouldnt...
cinderello: haha....humaba na yung kwento..
Kingkang: haha...
cinderello: but seriously...i'll be ok...
Kingkang: please be ok...
cinderello: and thanks for being patient..
cinderello: and for being there...
Kingkang: im sori i cant do anything about it...
cinderello: knowing u undertand me is good for me for now...
Kingkang: anu daw...puro "for"?
Kingkang: hehe...ok nagets ko na...
cinderello: haha...i whats happening with my grammar
Kingkang: lagi namn ata kita naiintindihan....
Kingkang: katulad nyan....
Kingkang: haha...
cinderello: erase that i..
cinderello: haha...
Kingkang: see...
Kingkang: obviously naiintindihan nga kita...
cinderello: ok...
Kingkang: hmmm ok that thing i wana tel u knina...
Kingkang: i fee bad pag hindi kita napapatawa...i feel bad that im no help and i cant do anything about it....and i am so sori....
Kingkang: ayan nasabi ko sa wakas...
cinderello: what may fee? may bayad?
Kingkang: haha..
Kingkang: FEEL...
Kingkang: hmp seryoso pa namn yon...
cinderello: i dnt have cash..
Kingkang: nako e mahal pa namn ako...wala kang cash? check na lang..
cinderello: lol...
Kingkang: tawa...
cinderello: hmmm...
Kingkang: hmmmm?...
cinderello: teka ikaw...ok ka lang..
Kingkang: ano daw?
cinderello: btw i saw the pics from the outing..
Kingkang: a....
cinderello: looks like u guys had so much fun...
cinderello: kakamiss..
Kingkang: yep...uwi na...
Kingkang: madami nakamiss dont wori...hindi ka nagiisa...
cinderello: haha...
cinderello: i wish i can just go there right now..
Kingkang: hmmm lipad?
cinderello: cge...hintayin mo ko...
Kingkang: nako its raining outside..mababasa ka tol..
cinderello: sa may jollibee..'/
Kingkang: haha...
cinderello: nasa loob ako...kumakain na..
Kingkang: haha..order mo ko sundae!
cinderello: wala daw sunday...umuulan..
Kingkang: meron....
cinderello: ka-close mo yung manager..
cinderello: wla daw sabi ni Ate..
Kingkang: meron yan...
Kingkang: hehe kulet...
cinderello: haha..
cinderello: btw di pa ako offically nagpapaalm di ba...
Kingkang: ha?
cinderello: bibisitahin namin si mommy sa May
Kingkang: ahhh...
Kingkang: oke...
Kingkang: surprise un?
cinderello: wel technically it was supposed to...kaso may nadulas...and nasabi na sa kanya
Kingkang: nge...
cinderello: its her 50th b-day kasi sa JUne 20...and no one is avaible that day/week
Kingkang: ahhh 50 na xa?...
cinderello: and si ate Co pinayagan sa work nya...
Kingkang: thats cool...
Kingkang: kasama kuya mo?
cinderello: nope...its just me and Ate Co..
cinderello: he will see her in August...
Kingkang: ahhh..at least matutuloy pa rin pala...
cinderello: and i guess you will see her..
Kingkang: that was the previous plan di ba na pupunta si ate coco..
Kingkang: hmmm malamang....
Kingkang: ai wait sino ba tunutukoy mo..
Kingkang: c kuya mo?
Kingkang: haha i thot ur mom...
Kingkang: mkikita ko si kuya mo? hmmmm....
cinderello: haha..
Kingkang:
Kingkang: wait may tanong....
cinderello: ?
Kingkang: pagbalik mo u still have skul ryt?
Kingkang: or...
cinderello: wel technically if i decided not to...
Kingkang: oh...
cinderello: continue...i'll be free
cinderello: but i'm planning to look for a job...
cinderello: i dnt wanna be BUM and just have a good time...
Kingkang: hmmmm..ok so technically the decision wil be made around that time...
cinderello: yup..
Kingkang: hmmm di bagay sayo ang bum....papayat ka....
Kingkang: or not?
cinderello: haha...
Kingkang:
Kingkang: well...u have all my support wat ever u decide to do...
Kingkang: just make sure u talk about it with family...
Kingkang: your..
cinderello: hmmm...technically aside from kuay your the only person i talk to anout it..
Kingkang: hmmm which is not really a gud thing right?
Kingkang: i mean..
cinderello: ....wel i will tell them eventually..
cinderello: coz i'm still in the process of getting all thing togteher...coz i wanna tell them why? and whats my plan is?
Kingkang: hmmmm...ok..
Kingkang: hmmm ok...
Kingkang: make sure to explain wel..
Kingkang: it may break their heart...
cinderello: ikaw i know its not that clear...but i hope u understand
Kingkang: but for sure eventually they'll undertand....
Kingkang: i do undertand...
cinderello: haha...it not like i'm gonna be doing something bad...
Kingkang: haha..onga..helow...
cinderello: haha...
Kingkang: basta dont wori naiintindihan ko oke...
cinderello: hey..imma go soon..
Kingkang: ayoko nga...
Kingkang:
cinderello: so what u wanna do
Kingkang: haha...
cinderello:
Kingkang: loko lang...
cinderello: haha
Kingkang: be ok ha?
Kingkang: andito lang ako....
cinderello: i'll be Ok...
Kingkang: ayokong dumagdag sa iniisip mo...
Kingkang: optimism...good...
Kingkang: btw..ur blog seem so sad......soooo sad....it made me cry...
Kingkang: wait anong oras na pala...
cinderello: 248am
Kingkang: natulog ka na ba?
cinderello: i need to go soon...coz i have to go to school tom..
Kingkang: ok...
cinderello: haha..parand grade 1
cinderello: parang..
Kingkang: utoy...
cinderello: okei...and im tired na rin...
Kingkang: pahinga ka...malapit na..
Kingkang: tiis pa...
Kingkang: hm parang ansagwa nung sinabi ko..
cinderello: haha..
Kingkang: i didnt mean it..
cinderello: ingsat ja kng palagi
Kingkang: ayan mali mali na type...opo boss...
Kingkang: ingat ka din...
cinderello: and jst keep the faith...and believe everything will happen in the right tiem
Kingkang: opo.....
Kingkang: u too....ha?
cinderello: tulog na ako..
cinderello:
Kingkang: antok na...
Kingkang: xa pahinga ka na...
cinderello: okei...bye...tc..
Kingkang: byes...tlak to you soon..
cinderello: k..
Kingkang: love you...
cinderello: love u..
Kingkang:
Kingkang:
Kingkang: powerhug and powerkiss..
cinderello: save those next time...need to rest right now,,,
cinderello: just kidding...thanks,
Kingkang: oke...
Kingkang: welcome...
cinderello is typing a message.
cinderello: bye n
Kingkang: bye....